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Do As Tokyo Does It's My Subway
(Entered Jul. 10, 2008)
  Recent Do As Tokyo Does:

A recent law passed by the Tokyo government now makes it illegal to be in the subway stations, as well as ride the trains anytime I happen to be in them. I happily discovered this wonderful loophole the other day when taking the morning train to work, and I plan to strictly enforce it from here on. Starting tomorrow, anyone caught in the subway when I'm there will in effect be breaking the law. Don't believe me? This sign I found in Nijubashimae station should clear things up for you. I've outlined the important bits in red just for you slower people.

New Subway Laws!

That's right! 'Any' other acts that might inconvenience me. Well let me see... Having to deal with crowds of people in the subway stations is a pretty big inconvenience, and therefore by this sign's own definition, is a direct violation of the law. Heck even a couple people is an inconvenience! So henceforth, whenever I enter the station, everyone has to leave immediately or face legal action and punishment (and maybe a few thousand volts from a taser). It of course follows that if there can be no one in the subway stations when I'm there, no one is allowed to be on the trains either.
I guess I should post my work/commuting schedule near the subway entrances so everyone can see it and prepare themselves accordingly? Wow, it's going to be awesome to be able to have the whole train to myself! What a deal!

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